My Akashic Journey – Chapter Seven – Timeline Whores of the Multiverse


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Yeah, I said it. When I asked my higher self just how many different timeline lives she was living, she replied, “Oh, about 150.” And so, I admit it, I called her a Timeline Whore. She laughed, of course. And you are probably laughing, too, but, at the time I said it, I was really kind of pissed, to be honest. For about a day or so, it made me feel like I didn’t even have a soul. Like I’m just a pawn. An experiment on a timeline. A fucking GAME to her. I mean, seriously??? One hundred and fifty???!!! All at ONCE? C’mon!!! Who has time for that? Who can keep TRACK of all that drama?

“Don’t even try to comprehend it from where you sit,” she said.

So I didn’t. Whatever, right? It took a couple of days for me trust her assurance that she is with me, always, for every short and long breath.

The conversation happened after I wrote chapter seven of My Akashic Journey, which presented me with more information than I could process in one day about multiple timelines within the multiverse. It has taken me a couple weeks and a bit of consultation with my trusted advanced-consciousness cronies to actually make the decision to publish this mind-bender. Hold onto your hats. I kept seeing 555 codes everywhere before I conducted this reading and wrote this chapter…

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On May 10th I was thinking about a reading I had just given and how it is interesting the way soul groups tend to surround a particular issue and weave in and out of it, playing all the different roles surrounding the issue in order to help one another come to terms with it. I realized it was a lot like higher education, in a way. As undergrads, we pick a major and we study all the components necessary to get a degree in that field. In that major we may feel drawn to a more particular sector, so we go on to investigate further and obtain a master’s degree. We may even decide to then take it one step further and get that doctorate in order to gain the expertise to help others. And once we are helping others, we know we have truly evolved, right? As I was pondering this metaphor, a tidal wave of information crashed down on me about my own life… and reincarnation… and timelines… and… how to finally explain, once and for all… that we are living ALL of these lives simultaneously. WHOA. Talk about drowning in TMI all at once! Damn. I feel like I have a concussion as I write this, but I know I have to, or I will forget everything as quickly as it hit me.

Okay, so I have been shown a few things in a matter of MINUTES, but I know it is going to take hours to explain it all, since the flashes of “Remember this? And that? And THIS? See how they’re all connected?” is going to actually take time for me to explain to everyone who does not live inside my head. Keep in mind, these are pieces of a puzzle that have shown up over several years of time in my own personal life in this particular timeline we are currently sharing. I will present them chronologically and as concisely as possible (sort of like Exhibit A, B and C in a courtroom drama, if you follow).

All my life, in my heart I have known about reincarnation. I have known of my roots and bloodlines, even, that connect me directly to who most know as Jesus Christ. Yes, crazy, I know. That is why I never, EVER talk about it… until recently, of course. As the puzzle pieces begin to come together and I am awakening to who I am – several fractals of one light being who is living many, many timelines all at once – it is starting to (very slowly) make more and more sense. I don’t have all of the answers yet because there is no photo to compare the puzzle pieces to, if you know what I mean. I am just blindly fitting these pieces together, unsure of what “big picture” they will ultimately create actually looks like. When I think about this stuff, I am reminded of the Terminator movies and Butterfly Effect.

Why Terminator you ask? Well, as I see it, what is actually going on is that we are living all these lives at once on different timelines and looking to our “future” selves to be the masters or the experts, if you will, who have the ability to look back or travel back into other timelines to share information or expertise that will enable our other fractal selves to solve problems and issues that could otherwise harm us or the planet in one way shape or form. And, like Butterfly Effect, we are even living some of the same lives during the same timelines over again to fix or repair mistakes that cost us in the future lives. WHEW!! Okay. Crazy, I know. Hard to follow? You bet! But, I finally GET IT!!! This is the way my guides explained it to me:

Imagine yourself at a BINGO Hall playing several cards at the same time. Say you have five cards. (Each represents a different life on a different timeline.) Now, it is unlikely that any two of those five cards will be exactly the same, but, while rare, it IS possible. (Meaning that you can live the same exact life as the same person during the same time period… BUT, the difference being that it’s a different timeline, so in that life the history can be completely different. Now we’re getting into Groundhog Day kind of stuff: do it over until you finally get it right). While the BINGO card metaphor doesn’t quite bring it home, it sort of helped make sense of how our higher selves are playing out several lives all at once… and sometimes even two versions (maybe even more) of the SAME life during the SAME time period on different timelines.

You’re probably wondering how this crazy stuff even came into my mind. Well, as I explained before, it arrived in pieces, over several years, which were all just presented to me in reminder flash fashion about 90 minutes ago in that tidal wave of TMI.

These flashes did NOT come in chronological order, so try to follow.

A few weeks ago I had a dream about my twin flame soul mate and I. I could tell by the songs on the radio, our clothes and our hairstyles and simply by the way we looked that this was the early 90s, back when we were just out of high school. We were sitting in her car in her parents’ garage listening to the radio. I had just told her something about some guy who had date raped me, and I leaned my head on her shoulder. There was so much love and trust between us, I could feel it. She then invited me into the folded down backseat as her dad’s silhouette appeared in the doorway that led into their house. We managed to duck just in time to escape his attention.

We curled up on the flat surface in the back seat and laid there in the dim lighting of the garage contently looking at each other.

“My parents think I’m a lesbian,” she finally whispered to me.

I felt myself gasp as the dream came to a screeching halt.

I woke up going, “Whaaat the FUCK???”

Primarily because it felt so REAL. Like I had actually BEEN there with her, in that very place, at that very time, in that very moment. What I mean is that it felt a lot more like a memory than a dream.

Holy crap, I thought to myself. It was real? It was real, wasn’t it? Scarborough? We didn’t know each other back then. Not at all. How can this be real?

“It was another life on the same timeline,” Scarborough, my higher self explained.

WHAT???

I scrambled out of bed and immediately went to my computer and wrote to Ariel Deangelis:

Hey… got a question for you regarding the concept that we live all our lives at once vs. the one-life-at-a-time-but-not-necessarily-in chronological-order philosophy…

Since we can hop into any timeline… is it possible for us to hop into the SAME timeline and live the same lives over and over again, but switching things up to get different results? (Sort of like Butterfly Effect, but it being an entire lifetime rather than just several time jumps?)

I had this weird dream this morning that is prompting this question. Just wondering what you think.

Ariel’s response:

Yes… have you sensed this happening… you are not alone.

My reply:

So what IS this? Groundhog Day? We keep doing it over until we get it right?

Ariel’s response:

Yes, interesting isn’t it? [Arch Angel] Michael likened it to me the other day as us being at a point which we’re ALL going to Ascend – those of us who have chosen to, anyway… as you might have deduced, we’re not all exactly ready to do that… lots of unfinished business, both here and “there”… so, in effect, we have the “ability” (if you want to call it that) to hit “rewind,” go back (or forward – cuz even if you go back, you’re still moving forward) to a previous (and/or slightly different) “timeline” (or “point of experience”) which enables us to “have another go” at it… yeah, that’s a kind of a “Michael-y” sort of explanation, but nevertheless, pretty close to what we are experiencing now… so you see, we really DO have ALL of ETERNITY to get it “right” …  the fun is just beginning…

WOW.

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Okay, so there is Exhibit A. The dream. There were other dreams I had about that timeline, too, that I don’t want to get into because they involve the one with the negative energy who threw the “curse” on my father’s grandfather and how my twin-flame soul mate became entangled with her. At first, my thought was that life had already been lived out and that we failed our mission, so we are doing it over, but now as I write this, I realize we are probably living that exact same life RIGHT NOW and perhaps we have not failed… YET… or perhaps, even, THIS is the life in which we could either succeed or fail. Or maybe everything… every OTHER life being lived at this very moment that we are tapping into through dreams or “memories” is actually CONTINGENT upon THIS life, THIS now. WOW. No pressure or anything. I’m not saying I’m right about this, because there is still a LOT that doesn’t add up or make sense. And no, I am not on a mushroom trip or any other “trip,” for that matter.

After they remind me of the dream, my guides show me Exhibit B. The photo. A few months ago, my twin-flame soul mate sent me a photo of herself when she was probably in fifth or sixth grade. She sent me several, actually, from grade school. She looked boyish, and very, very cute in all of them. There was the one photo, from fifth or sixth grade (she couldn’t remember which) that kept coming back to me over and over again for days and weeks after she’d sent it. I felt a deep connection with that one photo for some reason. I told her my feelings about it. Her only response was: “Weird.”

Yeah. Weird. Now I feel that maybe that is when we made our first connection with each other in this other life we are living on that “slightly different timeline” as Ariel describes it. You see, in “this life,” my twin flame and I did not even meet until May 5, 2007, when we were both 36 years old. But I am now beginning to have strong feelings that we met much earlier on this other timeline I have been dreaming about. And, this may sound really weird, but I almost miss that life and find myself longing to go back to it, even though I am not at all familiar with it.

I’m standing at the dishwasher loading dirty plates as this feeling comes over me about the photo again… the same place I’ve been standing and same chore I have been doing when the photo connection feeling has come up several times over the past few months. So maybe the dishwasher is some kind of link? It’s possible. We DID have dishwashers way back then – when I was in grade school and middle school – believe it or not. Perhaps loading and unloading it was one of my chores at that time when I often found myself thinking about her? I suppose my Akashic Records could tell me.

Then my guides show me Exhibit C, that ornate tile décor I noticed in my dormitory building at 4 Charlesgate East in Boston, Massachusetts, when I was a freshman at Emerson College. I recognized it immediately and realized “I’ve been here before,” with utmost clarity and certainty. Then I frowned. “But I’ve NEVER been here before,” I reminded myself. I later told my friend Wil (yes the Emerson shuttle bus driver I had a crush on for years) about it.

I remember how he stared straight ahead and said to me, “You’ve been there before.”

It gave me goose bumps.

“Fuckin’ Wil the bus driver,” I chuckled to myself. That dude and my attraction to him was always such a mystery to me. But I realized this morning that he served a purpose far greater than I ever imagined until… well… this morning. He was the very first person I talked to about reincarnation who actually affirmed it. Holy crap. That was 24 years ago! Wil the bus driver is now 68 years old. Sorry. I digress. But you get the idea of how long it has taken to put these pieces together.

And Exhibit C reminds me of the fact that my twin-flame soul mate was out there, in Massachusetts, around the same time as me (on this timeline, in this life). When I was out doing yard work the other day, her higher self Ulron told me that he wanted SO badly for us to meet out there. He tried so HARD to nudge her to go to Boston.

“I would have found you,” he said. “And she would have talked to you. Just imagine what it would have been like…”

“Dude, I thought I was straight then,” I reminded him. “Nothing would have happened.”

That led me to wonder, though… about this slightly different timeline… did I go out to Boston to college in that timeline or not?

So many things to ask my Akashic Records! Here I go…

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I had this dream about me and my twin-flame soul mate sitting in her car together talking when we were in our late teens or early twenties, but I did not know her at that time in this life. Scarborough says we have lived this life as the same people during the same time period before. How is this possible? What can you tell me about timelines and simultaneous lives?

Jen, this is Christopher, a loved one and member of the Ring of 500. I will attempt to answer this question for you as best I can, me being in spirit world and you being in 3D. I have been there before, myself, so I know how difficult it is to grasp this concept since your entire life and world is run by a clock and timelines other than the one in which you currently live are also incomprehensible.

First, let’s be clear: You, Jen Freer, have not lived ANY other lives other than the one you are currently living. Your higher self, however (the REAL you — Scarborough) has lived many. Or created many, I should say. Some will call these many lives (or characters, if you will) “fractals.” Or, as we say over here in spirit world: “experiments.”

Remember when you were younger and you played with your Barbie dolls and Adventure People? You created story lines for them, right? And, as a writer, when you write your fictitious stories, you do the same thing, don’t you? You create characters and story lines. Well, higher selves do the same thing. They are the creators, or the authors, so to speak. And, just as you may have three or four different story ideas, all with completely different characters living in completely different places during different time periods that are in varied states of completion, your higher self has a lot of the same kind of thing going on. Now remember, higher selves are Masters. They are able to be in several places all at once. They can have many fractals (lives) going on simultaneously. And, just as an author can pick any time period for which their story takes place, master higher selves can do the same thing.

Okay, Christopher, if I may interject? I would like to ask, then, why am I having memories or dreams of other lives my higher self has lived?

Because you are connected. You keep reading and hearing the phrase “we are all one.” And that is true. Because every higher self is a fractal of source energy (or GOD energy). Your higher self is trying to share with you your connection to her and all the other creations she has made. You are an extension of her, just as all these other storylines and characters are extensions of her.

What about the twin-flame soul mate?

Also an extension of her. The masculine energy. Okay, see, Ulron and Scarborough are a pair that were split from one fractal into two. And they, together, can decide if they are going to co-create or not. So, while they mostly DO co-create together, sometimes they do not. For you, Jen, they have co-created, meaning that you and the person you feel is your twin flame will come together on your timeline to clear up old energy and move into oneness together to create healing projects. The exact details of these creative projects are pretty much unwritten because Scarborough and Ulron want to leave the creativity up to the two of you, once your vibrations are equal and the two of you are once again in harmony.

Okay, so, if we are ONLY us, then why is it we are affected by other lives our higher selves have lived? Like, why are we purging LIFETIMES of “past traumas” and fears and other general suckiness?

Because we’re all one. Think about it. When you’re writing a story, are the characters in your story influenced by your own emotions?

Sometimes, yes. But not always. Because sometimes I am writing as an escape.

Ah. But, still, the characters are an extension of you. So, whatever you are feeling or have experienced or imagine, they are essentially going to experience, too, at some time or another within the storyline. Because YOU are the creator. Right?

Yes. But I thought higher selves were supposed to be Masters.

Yes. They are masters. But they are not necessarily fully ascended masters. Do you understand?

No. I thought Masters meant fully ascended.

No. Not necessarily. Just like those with a master’s degree from grad school don’t yet have their doctorates, you see? It’s much like that, OR, Karate. You cannot get the black belt until you have all the other colored belts first.

So it’s another hierarchical system?

If you want to see it that way. But this is more about energy – vibration and frequency – more than it is about rank and power and authority. In a way, you are like the “feeler” for your higher self. Your higher self experiences energy through you and gains knowledge and wisdom from your experiences much the same way you as an author learn from your own characters in your stories, right? Not to be crude, but it is almost like the scientists who put mice in a maze and move the cheese around and change up the patterns of the maze to see how the mouse will react and respond. But that is more beginner level stuff.

So what is the higher self hoping to gain from all of this?

Understanding. Wisdom. And, ultimately, ascension into a higher vibration.

For what, exactly?

The opportunity to explore the higher dimensions. One must achieve a higher vibration in order to access the higher dimensions.

So it IS like a video game?

In some ways, yes. But far more exciting and rewarding.

How so?

Because it’s the multiverse. It is infinite.

Okay, so, explain to me again why a fractal like myself has to feel the pain and suffering of other lives (fractals) being lived by my higher self.

Well, it did not used to be that way. Because levels of consciousness are higher now, more and more fractals are becoming aware of their connections. Unity consciousness is beginning to connect more and more of these fractals to their source energy and all of its other fractals. Everything is energy, my dear. You know that whole deal about E-motion being energy in motion? How no emotion is good or bad, it’s just energy? That is exactly true. And it is exactly why fractals are tapping into their higher selves and the other fractals being lived by your higher self. So, WERE you on the Titanic with your twin-flame soul mate when it went down? No. JEN was not. But Scarborough was. And Ulron was. And they are the REAL you. So you feel the energy and emotion attached to that incident. Or as much as your higher self feels it, anyway.

I do not feel as affected by it as much as my twin-flame soul mate does, but let me ask you a couple of questions about that, since you, Christopher, were the one who came through when we did her reading about the Titanic. You said she was an architect and a designer who worked on that ship, but she went to another psychic and asked him if that was true, and he said no, that she was some sort of crew member who reported the iceberg and was dismissed and then was the first to die in a wall of water. Why are we getting conflicting stories about this?

First, let me ask you this… did the psychic open her Akashic records?

I don’t think so, but I don’t know for sure. I don’t believe it was an Akashic reading. Just an intuitive reading as far as I know.

Did the psychic speak directly with her higher self, Ulron?

I don’t know. Is it possible Ulron created two fractals of himself who were on the ship at the same time?

It’s possible, but I cannot say without her records being open.

What do my records say?

Your records say only one fractal on the Titanic with Ulron’s fractal. But that doesn’t mean he did not have another fractal on that timeline or a slightly altered timeline.

How would you describe a “slightly altered timeline?”

Staggered. One that is slightly behind. A do-over timeline, basically. You know how things are always being revised? Consider it something like that. It’s usually a fail. If you remember the movie you mentioned earlier – Butterfly Effect – it’s a lot like that. You know how he keeps going back and trying to “fix” or “repair” the past to create a better or more ideal present for the girl he loves, but everything he does only seems to make matters worse? Yeah. It’s a lot like that. Again, like I said, it’s all experimental. Nothing is actually made better or worse… just different.

But, with the Titanic, the ship goes down and 1500 people die. And JP Morgan gets away with it all.

On your timeline it does, anyway.

What does that mean?

It means… what you perceive as reality isn’t necessarily so. It all depends on which timeline you are living.

So there is possibly a timeline where the Titanic doesn’t sink?

There are many timelines where the Titanic is a success.

Seriously?

It’s all about energy, my dear. Collective consciousness energy. Remember the Matrix? Which pill will you choose? Red or blue? Which pill did your higher self choose? You see, this is why not ALL higher selves are “ascended Masters.”

What if I want a different timeline?

Well, I am afraid that isn’t possible from your vantage point. Although everything CAN be changed collectively… through collective consciousness. Or you can always merge and become one with your higher self.

Okay, what about this other “slightly altered” timeline in which my twin-flame soul mate and I are living (or lived)? What can you tell me about that life? Where did we first meet? How old were we?

On that timeline, you met in grade school. You transferred in to her school in Elkhart, Indiana when your dad got a job on the police force there. You were about 10. You were both little tomboys, although you were the more feminine and she was the more masculine. You got along swimmingly from the get-go. Dirt bikes, skateboards, basketball, baseball, fishing. You actually lived pretty close to each other, near the river, so you had plenty of adventures together. Until you went your separate ways after high school. You went away to college. Boston. She stayed in Elkhart. You got married. She explored same-sex relationships.

Scarborough said we failed our mission in that life.

Yes. The third party – the girl with lupus – bailed.

Bailed?

Expired.

So what happens on that timeline, then?

It has already dissolved.

So is this the only timeline we have left to complete the mission?

Looks like it, yes.

Why did the other timeline dissolve? I mean, if only one person died?

Everyone eventually died, dear.

So it’s a past life, then? Not currently being lived simultaneously?

As I said before, timelines are staggered, so not every single fractal of your higher self is happening simultaneously. So, as your perception goes, from your current vantage point, yes, this could be considered a “past life,” since everyone on that timeline has expired.

So this life for us IS a “do over?”

You could consider it that, yes.

What happens if we fail in this one, too?

Why would you let that happen? You’re both consciously aware of why you’re here and what needs to happen. Your higher selves put you here in this particular timeline of heightened awareness so you would not fail.

Why is it so important that we “reverse the curse,” anyway? Can’t we just cancel the contracts?

Sure, you can cancel the contracts. But that doesn’t clean up the mess. That’s just calling quitting time before the job is done, you see. And it is important to fulfill the contract because your father’s grandfather’s family is a direct descendent bloodline of Sarah (higher self Scarborough), the daughter of Jesus and her twin-flame soul mate Luke. And Jesus likes to keep a tidy bloodline, you see. Not to mention that this dark energy has affected a LOT of people. Not just the families, but everyone the descendents of these two families come in contact with on a daily basis. All in all, that is a LOT of people.

Well, I feel like there is nothing I can do. I did the best I could, and it wasn’t good enough. What more can I do?

You’ve done all you can. The rest is up to the other two parties of the contract. Send love and light and keep the faith. The truth is out, and it is accessible. Other parties willing to lend their light and positive energy to the situation are welcome to assist at any time, should they find it in their hearts to do so. You did not fail. And this is far from over. Stay positive. Raise your vibration in faith and love. You have a good number of angels and ascended masters on your side.

I already know what they will say. They will say this is my ego talking, and that I am just trying to manipulate the situation to my favor.

What does Grandpa James always tell you? Hearts don’t change. Only minds change. Hearts stay true. Forever.Your heart is true. Your love is unconditional. It always has been. That is why you were chosen.

Thank you, Christopher.

Chosen. That is a word I heard a lot as a kid. In my head, when I was riding my bike alone or wandering through the woods. A gentle man’s voice told me over and over: “You are a golden child, Jen. A chosen one.” I do believe I asked my mom once what it meant to be a “chosen one.” Her answer sounded like a lot of pressure. I just wanted to play and be carefree. Needless to say, I ignored those messages as I moved into middle school and blocked out the voice. No wonder it is taking so long to put all the jigsaw pieces back together. If I had only listened…

But that is what free will does for us. Our egos want all this independence. Ego says: This is MY life! I’ll do as I please!

And, of course, ego never wants us to believe anything good about ourselves. No wonder our higher selves have to create so many fractals. So very few are willing to listen to them.

So now we know. We have a choice. We can follow the guidance of our higher selves, stick to our contracts, and ascend with them. Or we can be another junk fractal that didn’t work out. A used bingo card. An experiment. Or a failure requiring a “do over.”

Which will YOU choose?

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My Akashic Journey – Chapter Five – Kicking and Screaming


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A Reunion Broken.

So last summer my dream came true; I reunited with my twin-flame (sacred-union) soul mate. We enjoyed a blissful few months together. She proposed to me on the beach in front of a circle of our closest Pleiadian friends currently incarnate with us from the Pleiadian Ring of 500 the night before my birthday. What I thought was a birthday cake was actually a proposal. Written on the cake in orange (my favorite color) lettering was the question: “Will you marry me?”

Of course I said yes. We had a beautiful evening with music, fireworks, dancing and late-night dipping in Lake Michigan. It was the best night of my life, to be with the one I love with all of my heart and soul and all of our closest, dearest friends and Pleiadian family members. It was also the best birthday of my life, as she agreed to move in with me. We had a wonderful two months of bliss, but then, of course, fear set in and my twin-flame ran again.

My Akashic Records and other sources say that we will reunite again one day. I trust this is true because no matter how hard I try to move on without her, nothing works. Even if I want it to. I met someone recently I was pretty excited to spend the rest of my life with, but, no sooner than I got my hopes up, I received a barrage of text messages from HER fiancé. Yeah. Nice.

Doom and Gloom.

I see that I am doomed to sit in misery while I continue to WAIT, stalled out in this ridiculous holding pattern because someone is too scared to be happy. Some days, I honestly would rather slit my throat to end this nightmare. I never really even wanted to be here in the first place. I’m sure this is true because I constantly have this feeling that I was dragged into this life. Or pushed. Or coerced. That is just how it feels. NOTHING is ever enjoyable for me. Even when I am happy, it can only be for a few minutes at a time because someone is ALWAYS fucking it up for me. Yeah, I said it! The F-word. Come on, you know this would not be a true heart-felt chapter of my journey without it!

So, I could go on and on here and tell you how it’s all bullshit – this theory or philosophy that “love heals everything” and that twin flames or sacred-union soul mates don’t ever really reunite in harmonious bliss (that we’re just here to push each other’s buttons and make each other LEARN, LEARN, LEARN all the difficult lessons in life.) Okay, that’s crap, too. Well, maybe it’s not. Maybe it’s true. But what I mean by “that’s crap” is that it is the stupidest fucking shit EVER.

Yeah, it WOULD be nice if we could all just LOVE each other and get along. It WOULD be nice if on December 21, 2012 all of our egos had dove to their deaths like suicidal lemmings so it COULD be possible to truly love without fear or doubt. But that didn’t happen, did it? Nope. Ego’s still here. Alive and kickin’ like a tenacious wild stallion. Annnd it still sucks. Big time.

As you can tell, I am having some major issues that I am wrestling with. And it is more than just losing my twin flame (AGAIN). I also lost my job. Which, at first, I thought was a blessing in disguise because I thought I could finally do Akashic Readings for a living, but, as things continued to get worse with my twin flame and the county kept threatening to take my house from me, I really lost faith. I mean… BAD.

YES, I am depressed. YES, I am a suicidal lemming in search of a nice, tall cliff with lots of jagged rocks and a pounding sea below. NO, I DON’T FUCKING CARE WHAT THE GOD DAMN LESSON IS IN THIS. FUCK IT!!! FUCK EVERYTHING. Let me GO HOME. NOW!!!!!

Sound familiar? I bet it does. I KNOW it does. I have had PLENTY of talks with people feeling exactly the same way I do. LOTS of people are feeling suicidal, believe it or not. Worthless. Hopeless. And helpless.

But, oddly enough, there is this inner calm in the middle of the storm. All of these thoughts raging, swirling, spiraling, and desperately trying to pull me (us?) downward into the deep, dark abyss of nothingness. But it fails every time because there is this deep inner peace with it all. What IS that? It’s… it’s like… do you remember those turtle floats we had as kids? Those dense expanded foam turtle shells they used to strap around our chests that stayed on our backs to help keep us afloat as we learned to swim? Yeah. It’s like one of those. Right in the center of my chest. And its message is perfectly clear:

Cry and whine all you want. Kick and scream, even. We’re NOT going down.

Faith Restored.

Somewhere in the middle of all of this, back in early January of 2013, I sought solace in my friend Ariel DeAngelis, who I consider to be a twin-flame expert. I told her how losing my twin flame again had made me second guess myself. My abilities as an Akashic Reader, actually. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I just made the whole thing up? If not, then why did we split again?

I know what most of you are thinking. Why didn’t I just ask my Akashic Records? Well, as I just said, I was afraid I was just plain wrong. That I had made it all up in my head. And that the concept of twin-flame soul mates is just bunk.

Well, of course Ariel had a lot of great answers and even some intuitive information about my twin flame that was pretty dead-on accurate despite the fact that she has never met either of us in person, nor does she know my twin flame at all, not even by a social networking connection. So she made me feel somewhat better with the old, “as twin flame soul mates, we’re always together, even when we’re NOT together.” Yep. Whether we like it or not. And I say that because I am really just tired of the ego bullshit that sends us meandering down the wayward idiot paths only to wind up back where we belong… TOGETHER. Being the higher spiritual (and extremely impatient) half, I honestly don’t see the “need” to be apart. BUT (I admit I DID ask my Akashic Records when she moved out WHY this was happening) the records revealed that my twin flame’s higher self had requested one last separation before oneness so he could better appreciate coming into oneness. I, of course, told him he’s an ass, and he had just better hurry up with that nonsense. (We really do make a phenomenal pair… WHEN we’re TOGETHER.)

Love is patient. Love is kind. What a bunch of bullshit! Get your scaredy-cat ass on this train. NOW!!!

Okay, you all get my drift. I’m SUPER impatient. EXTREMELY. Not to mention that I am just completely BORED with fear and its ill-effects on society in general and as a whole. Fear is stupid. It makes you think stupid things that manifest into crazy shit far worse than the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man. Did we seriously NOT learn ANYTHING from Ghostbusters? And why can we still not comprehend that worrying is like praying for what we DON’T want? CRIMINY!!!

Okay, done ranting. For a minute. Long enough to tell you what a genius Ariel DeAngelis truly is. When I thanked her for her comforting perspective, she told me to feel free to contact her any time. Even “the other way,” if I wished. I said that would be interesting, for certain. So she said, “let’s try it!” So we ran an experiment. I said I would telepathically contact her sometime that afternoon, but would not tell her what time, exactly. I would have a mental conversation with her, and then, later that evening, I would contact her and ask her what we talked about. She agreed to my terms and conditions.

Not to get all Mark Twain or anything, but I must digress for a moment, because this is what I do. Try to follow. I bundled up the Chihuahuas and took them for a nice, long, 90-minute power walk down to the golf course, around the 13th hole and back. It was on the way back that a random memory from 2006 popped into my head. Yes. 2006. I know. Just follow. It’s really significant to My Akashic Journey – Chapter Six – The Unexpected One. But it all started here. In this moment. On this walk before my telepathic conversation with Ariel DeAngelis. I don’t know WHY it came to me at that very moment that I was power walking the very steep winding hill on my way home, but it occurred to me that I needed to ask Ariel about the super weird thing that happened to me while watching DaVinci Code. I had not even thought about it since 2008 when I saw DaVinci Code the second time. But there it was, popping into my head, random as an ADHD Gen Y comedian. Stay tuned.

So when I got home, I sat on my exercise ball and began stretching. It was about 1:30ish. While stretching, I contacted Peter. You know, the Pleaidian being I sometimes channel. I said, “Hey, Peter, I am supposed to have a telepathic conversation with Ariel DeAngelis this afternoon. Let’s surprise her with a three-way call!”

Of course Peter was all for that! So we patched Ariel in and had a little conference call that was pretty lighthearted and full of laughter. After Peter “hung up,” Ariel and I continued our conversation with a topic she told me to ask her about. I won’t get into the details here, as that is all private and whatnot, but I will say that the details were… very detailed. And no, it wasn’t about Arch Angel Michael.

While we were talking, I got up to make lunch, so there were a couple of lulls in the conversation as I concentrated on cooking instructions and timing and whatnot. Yeah, I’m lame. I read the directions and follow them. Anyway, what I found interesting is that when our conversation was over and my lunch was finished, I wrote to Ariel and said, “Okay. What did we talk about?” she had the time of the conversation (between 1:30 and 2:00 PM EST) accurate as well as the two lulls in conversation I just described. Although she did not recall talking with Peter, she did remember the gusto with which our conversation began, and she also told me our three different topics exactly. Then she asked me, “Okay, so what did YOU hear ME say?”

I wrote her back with the very detailed details and she. was. FLOORED.

“Wow,” she told me. “You are the REAL DEAL.”

Of course, she never had a doubt.

And then she said, “If I don’t doubt you, then why do YOU doubt you?”

That was a very good question, indeed.

And that brought me the courage to share with her that memory I mentioned from 2006. Something I refused to accept about myself that I knew in my heart was true for a very long time. It was a knowing I believe I was born with, but never, EVER shared with anyone. It was the kind of knowing that is so certain that when this bit of craziness was sprung upon me in 2006 while watching DaVinci Code, I was not even surprised by it. But there was no way in hell I was going to accept it. Or admit it, for that matter. Stay tuned. I am about to open my Akashic Records and ask about it. ALL of it. And I guarantee you that the information I receive will knot up a bunch of Christian panties into an excruciatingly uncomfortable wad. Not that it’s my intention to do so. Like I said… I never wanted to know this information, let alone share it. Primarily because I know I will be attacked, damned to hell and shamed for it. But I figure, hey, my life already sucks. I might as well tell the truth since that is what I came here to do. Kicking and screaming.

What ARE the Akashic Records?


I first learned the term “Akashic Record” about four years ago, when I began studying crystal healing. The term kept appearing in various crystal properties. So, when a friend asked me about them, I knew what they were, but didn’t know how to access them, or why, exactly, I would want to. Shortly after she mentioned the Akashic Records, I began having dreams of my mother (who had crossed over into the spirit world) guiding me through tunnels or down long corridors. Eventually we ended up in some large, open room where the walls were actually

enormous screens filled with data. I figured this was my cue to figure out a way to access my personal records.

Before I begin sharing my journey through myAkashic Records, I thought it may be helpful to first explain what they are in the very simplest of terms.

What they are

Maybe it’s best to start with what the Akashic Records are NOT. First, there is no physical place that holds these records. It’s a lot like cyberspace. There’s all this information floating around in cyberspace, but there is no physical place to find it. The only difference is that the records are not kept in online databases. I can’t even tell you where they’re kept. That’s, apparently, spiritually classified information.

In all seriousness, the records are most likely kept with your higher self. (That would be, basically, your “true self,” also known as the light being that you are outside of your physical body, which some folks may refer to as your “soul.”)

So, in the quickest summary possible, the Akashic Records are the archives of every soul and every detail of every physical life that soul has lived, is currently living, and will live. The lords of the Akashic Records and your Masters, Teachers and Loved Ones (MTLOs) are there to help guide you from where they reside. Think of them as your personal Yodas, young Skywalker.

How to access the records

Personally, I use the Pathway Prayer that is provided in the book How to Read the Akashic Records by Linda Howe. However, I have read that we are bumping into our records all the time. Especially in our dreams. This is why we have those “deja vu” moments. Usually, we’ve had a precognition dream (accessed from our records) that has shown us a quick preview of those mind-blowing moments where we swear this has happened before, but it hasn’t. Sound familiar? I’m sure there are other ways to access the Akashic Records, as well, since more and more books and guides are becoming readily available as the levels of consciousness for everyone on the planet are rapidly rising. So, the choice is yours. Howe’s method works wonderfully for me, so I have not tried any other way.

How you know you’re “in”

The first time you open your records, it is recommended you just sit and feel the energy around you. You will notice a subtle, but definite change. For me, it’s like being in a lightly pressurized cabin. Not at all uncomfortable, but definitely noticeable. The first time I opened my personal records, I noticed  a vibration that felt something like a deep fog horn sounds, if that makes any sense. It was a gentle, slow, soothing vibration. I felt like I was being swaddled by the most loving, caring beings in the world. You may also notice colors or a light show, similar to the Aurora Borealis (Northern Lights) while you’re in your records. The communication you receive at first may be by feeling only. Or, if your MTLOs are especially eager to talk to you, (as I have witnessed on more than one occasion while in the records of others) they may speak to you right away. I’ve found, with the records of others, that my timid clients have records that are slow to open and super gentle loved ones come forward. My clients who are excited are often greeted by lively loved ones. I’ve even had to wait while three of them had to come to an agreement on who would speak first, while a fourth tried to skip process and bust on through.

The rules

Though it’s not a game, accessing the Akashic Records does come with a set of rules. For example, records for anyone under the age of 18 may not be accessed. By anyone. There are also rules about what kinds of questions you can ask. For example, “should I,” “when” and yes/no questions are not allowed. That is not to say that recommendations won’t be made, dates won’t be given or that a yes/no question won’t be addressed within the context of the answer of another question that is properly posed according to the rules. I have heard from others and read on blogsites that questions about the future are also prohibited, but this has not stopped me from asking my MTLOs what I can expect from time to time. Or sometimes they just tell me what I can expect, even if I have not asked. It is, however, important to always remember how free will plays a part, moment by moment, and can change everything. This is why it’s important to keep checking in with your MTLOs.

What the records can do for us

The Akashic Records can answer a variety of questions for us, that is true. Questions about past lives or current issues. Whatever causes you the most struggle or strife. Many feel that having these questions answered by their MTLOs has literally changed their lives. It is true that the Akashic Records can bring us great peace. They can also help us remember who we are, why we chose to be here, who we’re in soul contracts with and for what reason, and what we incarnated to accomplish in this life. Our records can offer us comfort and boost confidence and even bring immeasurable amounts of peace to our lives.